


Do you remember?

by Xander_The_Undead



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Heavy Angst, M/M, Sad sad sad, remembering back
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2021-01-03 03:21:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21172592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xander_The_Undead/pseuds/Xander_The_Undead
Summary: Eddie's last thoughts as he watches his friends defeat their childhood nightmare.





	Do you remember?

**Author's Note:**

> This is based off of the art work by the amazing [Jensuisdraws](https://jensuisdraws.tumblr.com/post/188235148924/thanks-merycula-for-this-idea-and-also-for) ! Go take a look at their stuff! Its great!

Do you remember me?

Do you remember me now?

I remember you.

I remember how much you loved Street Fighter.

How you would fix your glasses when you were nervous. How you’d laugh the loudest because you were the saddest most of the time. The nicknames you would call me and I’d tell you I hate them (but I really sort of liked them).

They were special. Something you came up with just for me.

You were special. Are special. To me. Always to me.

Do you remember the year you told us you were moving away? Bev, Ben, Stan and Bill had already left, memories of us remained here, locked up like a grain of sand that would someday become a priceless pearl. That’s what my memories of all of you were to me.

A pearl.

_ Aww, Eds! Don’t worry-_

_ Shut up! Just promise we’ll keep in touch, you dick! _

You looked surprised when you could see my cheeks were red and that I was actually upset. You smiled wide after a moment and reached out to ruffle my hair as if I was being stupid.

_ Oh, Eds. I’ll be sending polaroids of my dick to your mom so she doesn’t miss it so much. But I will make sure to drop you a line as well. _

I got mad and flipped you off as you laughed, but I could see the same sadness and uncertainty that I felt mirrored in your eyes.

We promised to write letters everyday to each other, hugging each other tightly while your parents waited patiently for us to separate. Your mom told me to come visit when I could, and you slipped me a piece of paper with your new address on it. You told me you didn’t know your new phone number, but you would send it with your first letter when you got there and told me I better memorize it.

You drove off that day, waving at me from the back window and that was the last I saw of you.

You never did send me your new telephone number.

You never sent me anything.

I sent you a letter everyday like promised.

After a bit, I stopped as well, knowing what your silence meant. 

I only cried for a week.

It was different with just Mike and me. Quieter. We talked about you guys a lot, how we missed Bill’s stutter, the way you would cough when you tried to smoke with Bev, Ben’s insane ideas and Stan sharp, dry humor. We loved you guys so much, even if you forgot us.

I never did try to write you again, except for once.

My mom had decided that being in Derry was no longer best for me and picked a place that when I checked, was only three hours from your house. I was so excited, you have no idea, I immediately started writing to you again to tell you I was coming. I was going to find you, you were going to remember me and we could continue as if nothing had happened. I wrote and told you all the things you had missed, what starting high school without my friends was like and everything.

I slipped it in the mail with the hope that you would open and read it.

Saying goodbye to Mike was so hard, and I promised with all my might I wouldn’t forget, that I would never forget his smile or how sweet he was. We both cried the night before I left, the two last Losers holding onto the secret the town had and, God, that burden was so heavy. The next morning, my eyes were red and swollen and I turned to watch out the back window as Mike and his bike grew smaller and smaller.

My heart hurt to leave Mike, but I was also excited with the idea that I could see you again. Hear your stupid jokes, feel your arm around my shoulders, hear all the nicknames I said I hated. I went to sleep in the car dreaming about being with you again, you and all our friends and it was beautiful.

I forgot you all in three days.

There were so many things I should have done, should have said as I lay here, my body going cold. I watch as you all, all of you so amazing and brave, defeat Pennywise. 

I loved you all.

I love all of my Losers.

I hope Derry is merciful this time, letting you forget me so this isn’t the last thing you see of me. Remember me as the small brave boy that secretly watched every move you made because I was so in love but had no idea. 

Please go on and have a good life. Be good to yourself because I can’t be there to do it for you.

I loved you, Richie.

I love you, Richie.

Goodbye, my brightest pearl.


End file.
